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Evelyn has seen every episode of Riverdale. Miranda hasn't seen a single one. Each week, they traverse the winding, trash-lined road that is the absolutely bonkers plot of CW's hit series: Riverdale. Miranda gets 3 screencaps handpicked by Evelyn, and the episode title to try and predict what's going to happen this week. Evelyn then guides her through what actually happens. And it's always, always worse than either of them could have imagined.
Episodes
Tuesday Sep 08, 2020
Tuesday Sep 08, 2020
Despite how crazy it was, last week might as well not have happened with how little it's mentioned this week. Thanks Riverdale.
Things come to a head far quicker than one might expect regarding Grundy's ongoing crimes, there's definitely a sheriff...but the jury is out on whether there's an actual police station, and a full-on biker gang is introduced about as naturally as the dialogue on this show.
Miranda is getting alarmingly close with her predictions, and Evelyn reads a pull quote from perhaps the best interview ever given. And did we coin a new phrase? Maybe.
Content Warnings:
- Domestic Abuse
- Emotional manipulation
- Firearms
- Identity theft
- Pedophilia
Music: "Imps" by Mark Revell
Tuesday Sep 01, 2020
Tuesday Sep 01, 2020
This week, if you thought things were wild before, things take a SHARP turn into the even wilder.
Alice helpfully explains what slut-shaming is, the show manages to do Ethel dirty even worse than the comics did, knock-off Velma Kelly threatens to boil a boy alive in a hot tub, and the football team is keeping a log of their sexual exploits...except it's lies?
Riverdale, as it turns out, is actually trying to say something about...like...society, man. Shockingly, they do a piss-poor job. This leads to Miranda having a fit of apoplectic rage, and Evelyn very concisely translating said rage into more coherent criticisms.
Also...what does the 'KJ' in KJ Apa stand for anyway?
(And seriously though: Don't look up 'sticky maple')
Content Warnings:
- Altered mental states
- Drug use/mentions
- Body shaming/fatphobia
- Interrogation
- Misrepresentation of mental illness
- Sexual exploitation
- Pedophilia
- Racism
Music: 'Imps' Mark Revell
Tuesday Aug 25, 2020
Tuesday Aug 25, 2020
This week, things only continue to get stranger and more uncomfortable on this godforsaken show.
Jughead rather alarmingly does not deny the accusation he is a necrophiliac, Cheryl stabs a frog (she's FINE), Reggie is definitely the showrunner's emotional punching bag, and we are quickly learning that Archie is bad at two things: Lying, and having a character.
Also: Miranda goes on a tangent about accents, and Evelyn is being haunted by the Grundy Ghost.
Content Warnings:
- Emotional abuse/Manipulation
- Incest
- Pedophilia
Music: 'Imps' by Mark Revell
Tuesday Aug 18, 2020
Tuesday Aug 18, 2020
Hi! Welcome to our podcast where we recap the Absolutely Bonkers show Riverdale, which is to say, we suffer! Join us, won't you?
Right off the bat, things are absolutely wild: Ms. Grundy is a criminal, Veronica's new in town (and is probably a robot), and there are an alarming amount of parallels to Glee. Plus: There's a dead body! Yikes! Sure hope they don't more or less drop the development of this plotline to deal with comparatively less important things! (They do).
Also...It's a book?!
Content Warnings:
- Death
- Emotional abuse/Manipulation
- Incest
- Pedophilia
Music: 'Imps' by Mark Revell